Life As Devious/Episdoe 9

2day we focus on 2 wyet fgts

"Hey Fitz why are we hated." Infected say

"Bc we're wyet lol" Fitz say

"But we are good. We not fgts anymore." Infected say

"True. Ig we just 2 white and nerdy."

"Wtf is 'white'" infected ask

"Idfuckingno man." Fitz say b4 chiwetel ejiofor and Rachel mcadams arrive 5 him in deir convertible

"YO BENEDICT LETS ROLL" chiwetel scream to Fitz

"AYEE CYA LATER INFECTED BOO. MCU PARTY. CHRIS PRATT GONNA BE DERE IMMA TRY FRENCH HIM" Fitz say

"Sigh. Lucky." Infected say

He mope around town all sad n stuff kicking a can

"Why no 1 respect me. I'm good guy. I'm hero. Fuck Dolan trump for giving wyets bad naem." Infected say as he keep kicking can

"Yo wtf." Lucas From ALRTF say

"Fkr that's my can" he say and taek can back

"Fgt" Lucas say as he leav and infected all sad

"W/e. Imma go masturbate. No1 want me anyway"

"SLOOT. FAM. ANSWER FKN PHONE OR I MAEK YOU BEBIS." Purry scream into phone. PBR not picking up.

"weird.." Infected say but he seen by Purry

"Hey coem here." Purry say

"Go kidnap PBR he the weakest of dem Devious Squad legends. Bring him 2 me so I can punish heem and I get u respect u so wish 4 heheh" Purry say all shady

"OMG OKAY" Infected say n he run to devious mansion

Infected arriev at mansiun n Kenberg not at DA gate bc he on holiday so Dudley Brooks there instead

"Who the fuck are you pudgy wyetie?" He say and take menacing stance like black hamsters do on tv, which his chest out and stuff

"Look man, in just here 4 PBR. He home?" Infected

"Oh. Yeah he here." Dudley say n open gate "go in and get him b5 I change my maend n beat ur ass" Dudley scoff

"LMAO OKAY" infected laugh at Dudley posing

Now infected inside mansiun and he greeted by Olvia

"Yo wtf u doin here. Did Mali not invite me to another party again?" Olivia say

"No I'm just here to kidnap PBR and bring to Purry so she can give him unspeakably horrific punishments" infected tell Olivia "best vag in DA worldlivia"

"OMG fun. I'll help u kidnap him." Olivia say

"Um, mom? Did you just say you're going to help this man kidnap uncle PBR?" Ashton Brooks say

"Uh, no." Olivia say. "I'll go f your dad." Olivia say n she leav.

Infected on his own

"Fuck." He say

"I can't let you kidnap my uncle." Ashton take firm stance but infected flick him to china.

" sigh...not again." Ashton say as he dangle for his life b4 an angry Chinese mob

Back at mansiun infected dodge KP who is having argument with his Xenomoprh wife, Dong Soo Bae

"No, honey. I'm not cheating on you with Uma Thurman and Sigourney Weaver! I'm serious!" KP lying bc he totally cream those vags

"geojismal ! dangsin babo bujeong haeng-wi saekki ! naneun dangsin-i geu jil-e modu leul geo al-a !" Soo Bae say n storm off

"Soo Bae, wait!" KP say as he chase after her, cumplenty ignorin infected

"Pheww. That was close." Infected say n he contined tiptoe around mansiun

"Ooo hey wyet Bb. Wanna fuck us?" Mary and Courtney corner infected

"Uh. No." Infected say scurred

"Heheh. Too bad Bb. Hope u liek pegging ;)"

"Oh fuck."

2 hours later

Infected cannot feel his ass

"Dis day ain't goin as I wanted it to."

"Until he see PBR wait what" infected say my line fkr

"Who's there?" PBR say, wearing glasses as he been reading neuroanatomy textbook

"Uh. Hi." Infected reveal himself.

"Hello Infected, what's the matter?" PBR ask

"I just got pegged by your nieces." Infected says

"What? I'm sorry, that must have been painful." PBR sympathize with infected bc Purry do same thing

"Tbh Purry want me to kidnap u bc u didn't return her calls. She gonna do same thing to you." Infected tell PBR

"Wtf. I'm on holiday! She even told me herself!" PBR say

"O. Srry I must do it to get respect." Infected say n PBR surrender

"If you must, go ahead." PBR say

But infected change his mind bc he know what raep is now liek

"No. I shall nut. Instead, let's go play xbox." Infected declare.

"OMG OKAY." And them 2 buddies leav to play xbox

'Meanwhile, Mali tied up in chai by Olivia

"Dis is gonna be a long night for me ain't it?" Mali say

"Tru Bb tru ;)" Olivia say

I'm Srry Mali