Guinevere/Issue 6

This is Issue 6 of Guinevere, entitled "Cheating".

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Issue 5; Cheating
With a weak smile, I continue sewing Alan’s scarf. I might make one to Rodney as well, now he gave me this pretty ring. He is a good friend. I’ve been writing in the diary every day. I almost feel like if I lived before the outbreak. I am living in a tower and writing in a book. Alan is, as usual, laying in the couch sleeping. We just had sex, and he is always tired afterwards. I never get tired for some reason, though. Rodney has been in the room next to this the whole morning. Maybe I should go and ask if he even wants a scarf. It is possible that he doesn’t. I get up, with a big smile walking into the room where Rodney is sitting. He is staring out of a broken window, looking over the decaying city. “Rodney?” I say, folding my hands in front of me. Seemingly startled, Rodney turns his head. He smiles awkwardly when he sees me. “I just wanted to say thanks for the ring.” I say, walking towards him with large, slow steps. “You already did.” Rodney mutters. He always mutters, never talking out loud. “I know, but it was really nice of you.” I say. I am now standing right next to him. I see him swallowing hard. “You’re... you’re welcome.” Rodney says, his eyes flackering. I see him checking me out. Flattered, I take his hand, kneel down and look him in the eyes. “I was thinking that maybe you wanted a scarf? I can make one for you.” I say, my smile never fading. Rodney is now seeming nervous, breathing slowly. He looks down saying “I would... I would like that.” I smile, and Rodney now looks at me as well. We are like this for a few moments. Then our faces meet and we are kissing. While I am enjoying it I feel like it is wrong. It takes maybe ten seconds, then I look frigthened at Rodney. I get up, leaving the room. Rodney gets up behind me, but doesn’t follow me into the other room, fearing what Alan might do if he found out. I am not going to tell Alan. It was a mistake, and everybody makes mistakes. I read that somewhere. “I’m sorry.” I hear Rodney saying from the other room. I don’t say anything, I just sit down and begin to work on the scarf again.

Later, I am cooking, Alan is still sleeping. It seems like that is the only thing he is ever doing. “Listen...” I hear Rodney saying. I don’t turn around to look. “We are low on food.” I just say, really not wanting Rodney to be near me right now. “Skye, I’m sorry.” Rodney says, sounding cincerily sorry. “Really.” I don’t respond. I just continue to heat the beans. “It was a mistake, okay?” Rodney says. I turn around to talk to him, when I hear yelling. The raiders. It doesn’t take many seconds for us to pack everything. Alan is standing with the pistol, handing me his backpack. That’s only fair, considering he is the one with the gun. “Come on.” Alan says, leading Rodney and me down. The raiders are very close now. I can cleary hear them. “Where are we going?” Rodney asks. “Zip it.” Alan says, and begins to run. I proceed to follow, but Rodney graps my arm. I look at him, shocked. “Sorry, Skye. Really.” Rodney says, looking me in the eyes. I see that he means it, and I nod. As I turn around to follow Alan, I then see him falling to the ground. The raiders are surrounding him, shooting him in the head. That’s the first time I have cried in ten years. Rodney takes me upstairs again, and we hide there. I don’t stop crying. Alan is dead, and so would I be if it wasn’t for Rodney. Alan is dead.