Anguish & Desire/Chapter Thirty Five

This is Chapter Thirty Five of Danganronpa: Anguish &amp; Desire, Unknown Time!. In this chapter, another body surfaces and it's up to the Ultimates to figure out whodunnit. Basically this is just like any other chapter of this story.

Author's Note: wowzers my laptop was broken for a month n it's finally back so i can finish this shit!! i was on pace to get it done before this year ended too smfh

“I don’t want to wake up.”

“You have to.”

“No I don’t, Touka.”

''“Big bro, please. You’re almost done.”''

''“It’s pointless. Everyone betrays you in the end.”''

“You don’t know that.”

''“Yes I do. I know it better than anyone.”''

''“End this. Save me and *STATIC*.”''

''“Huh...? Who’s that?”''

“Go before it’s too late.”

Touka...what…?!

My eyes shoot open, but everything is a dazed mess. My entire world is spinning, and there’s a huge stinging in my chest.

Everything is so, so dark.

I go to sit up, but my head meets wood. I could hear myself yelp out in pain...I hope no one else heard that.

Okay, Ken, please just take a moment. Calm down, calm down.

I take a deep breath or two, and...it’s no use. It’s still dark.

But...am I under my bed?

I’m definitely not on my mattress, so…

I steadily crawl forward and when it’s safe to stand, I do. Standing was another mistake, though, and my world just continues to spin. I catch myself on the wall, and try to regain my composure, to no avail.

“Rai…?”

My voice is dry. What the hell happened last night?

All I remember is Rai bringing me back water, and--! Right, right, okay...I’m still really confused. Did Rai drug me last night? What happened?

I feel...really sick.

“Rai?” I repeat.

I shake my head--this isn’t time to stand around. I stagger along the wall, and surprisingly I find my door with ease. I open my door, and am met by the bright lights of the hallway--super bright. They make my head hurt so much more--!

I fall to my knees in the hallway and I can’t stop my body from shaking. I cough and cough and puke and I quite honestly feel like I’m dying.

I hear a door open across the hall from me, and, footsteps quickly approach me. “Ken--Ken, are you okay?!”

I can’t muster any strength to respond. What...what did Rai drug me with last night? Were they trying to kill me...?!

After my body is finished getting rid of whatever drugs or food I ate yesterday, I can finally focus my attention on the boy kneeling beside me.

“H-Hey Satoshi.”

“Don’t ‘hey’ me,” he says. “What’s wrong--are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” I mumble. “Musta ate something bad.”

…

He doesn’t look very convinced, but he’s also looking panicked himself.

“What’s wrong?”

“My arrows, Ken. When I woke up this morning they were missing. My precious gift is missing--!”

“Di-Did you see them last--where did you--?”

I...can’t say what I want to. My mind isn’t working right.

“I’m sorry, Ken,” he says, and he interlocks my arm in his, and guides me to my feet. “I shouldn’t be so selfish right now.”

He guides me to the dining hall, and gets me tea and water, though I told him I didn’t need it. He is stubborn though, and kept going on and on about how dehydration is what’ll make you worse if you’re puking, so I had to stay hydrated.

...he’s right, though. I’m starting to feel a bit better now.

“You’re starting to get some color back in your face,” he says. “You okay?”

“Better,” I say. “What time is it?”

“Around 7:30.”

“I...see.”

DING DONG BING BONG

Huh…?

“What’s that?” Satoshi asks.

“A body has been discovered! Now, after a certain amount of time, the class trial will begin, so use this time wisely in discovering clues which lead to the blackened! Please come to the exit on the fourth floor!”

…

A body has been--?!

“Are you kidding me?” Satoshi asks.

Rai--!

Rai, Tomori, please--!

“Let’s go.”

Satoshi helps me up, and we hurry over to the fourth floor. As we get closer and closer to the exit, a feeling of dread falls over me.

Who is it?

Who could it possibly be?

I couldn’t stop myself from shaking as we got to the end of the hallway, and saw…

...and saw…

Sitting in a pool of blood with their back against the wall, a smile is itched onto their face. There’s two arrows piercing their body, one in their stomach, the other in their bare thigh. Red stains the body of Rai Kitoaji, the Ultimate Screenplay Writer.

“Rai…?”

My voice draws the attention of Tomori, Azama, Shiomi, and Nakata, who surrounded Rai’s body. MonoMech doesn’t stand too far away from them, and watches the scene with an ugly grin on his face.

“Why is Rai…?

This…

...is a joke, right?

Tomori frowns. “Rabbit…”

“Someone killed the beloved Rai Kitoaji!” MonoMech exclaims. “They took the bait!”

“What bait…?” Nakata asks. She asks MonoMech that question, but her eyes don’t leave me.

“I’m here to give everyone the MonoMech file, and offer something.”

“Offer what?” Azama asks -- her voice is strained, as if she were sick, or screaming for a long time.

“The traitor is the one who killed our beloved Rai,” MonoMech says. “So if you complete the class trial and get the traitor right, you can leave this place.”

...the traitor--they killed Rai?

Why is Rai not waking up…?

“That’s it,” MonoMech says, and just like that, he leaves.

There’s a silence that fills the room, and my eyes only remain with Rai. I don’t know what I was waiting for -- a twitch of the fingers, for Rai to pop up and announce it was a joke -- but I couldn’t take my eyes off of Rai.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Nakata slowly creep in frame.

“You.”

That was all she said before she lunged at me, knife in hand.

And, you know what? I didn’t care. It’d be so much easier if she just…

...but before she could get to me, a body put itself between us. Tomori’s ponytail hits me in the face, and she stands like my bodyguard.

“Enough.”

That was all she said, and I could hear Nakata click her tongue from here.

“If he dies, this is ended.”

“You’re talking like you know something we don’t,” Tomori says. “All we need to do is complete the class trial, and this is over. You heard MonoMech.”

“So we just do it?” Azama asks.

“Yes. Yes we do.”

I look around Tomori’s body to see Nakata, and once we make eye contact, she shrugs her shoulders. “Fine. But I get to interrogate him.”

“Do what you want,” Tomori says. “But if you hurt Rabbit…”

“It’s fine,” I say.

Thank you, Tomori.

I step forward, moving past Tomori, and closer to Nakata. “What do you wanna know?”

“Nothing yet, we need to proceed like usual,” she grumbles. “No one leave. We’re doing this as a group.”

Satoshi nods, and Shiomi adjusts his glasses.

“Fuck that.”

That was all Azama said, before turning her back on us and walking away down the hallway.

“Where are you going?” Shiomi asks. “You can’t leave--!”

“I’ll do whatever the fuck I want. Let’s just get this class trial over with.”

As Azama disappears down the hallway, Shiomi quickly runs after her. Nakata and Tomori are quick to bend down beside Rai’s body, and look over it.

I...don’t know if I can do this.

“Ken,” Satoshi says, and I feel his gentle hand fall on my shoulder. “Ken, look at me.”

I comply, and then I see that Satoshi had tears falling down his face, too. “I’m sorry. I know you two were close, but that’s why--!”

“I know, we have to do this. I just…”

“I’m here with you. If you uncover the traitor here, this game ends. It’ll finally end.”

But, Rai--!

I can’t think about that right now. I just nod, and bend down beside Tomori, as Satoshi bends down next to Nakata.

“Let’s look at the MonoMech file,” Satoshi says.

I look over his shoulder to view his, as mine is still in my room.

Victim: Rai Kitoaji

Cause of Death: Blood Loss

Time of Death: 3:39 A.M.

So it’s true? Rai’s really…?

The first thing I notice as I turn my attention to Rai’s body is how sad Rai’s eyes look. There’s something so somber about them, and, Rai’s got tears staining their cheeks. Besides that, there’s a gentle smile on their face, and at the corner of Rai’s mouth is smeared blood.

“It’s almost like Kitoaji was happy in their final moments,” Tomori says. “I wonder why that is.”

“Maybe Kitoaji saw something nice,” Satoshi says.

I doubt that.

“Like what?” Tomori asks.

He shakes his head. “They say before you die your life flashes before your eyes. Maybe it was that?”

…

No. The last thing Rai saw was the traitor. The person who killed them. The person who killed Yuka, Sasada, Tani, Yosano, Nakamoto. The person who killed everyone.

“It could be,” Nakata says, running her finger along, Rai’s body. There’s an arrow in Rai’s thigh, and one in their abdomen, too.

“What do you think happened?” Tomori asks.

“It looks like someone shot Rai with an arrow.”

“That’s not possible,” Satoshi mumbles, clutching his bow tightly. “The bow was with me when I woke.”

…

Oh, right.

“Before you mentioned that your arrows were missing, right Satoshi? What exactly happened?”

Satoshi takes a deep breath. “When I woke up this morning, my arrows were missing. The bow was where I left it, it was just the arrows which were gone.”

“Just your arrows…?” Tomori asks.

“Did you lock your door last night?” Nakata asks.

Satoshi tilts his head. “I think? I don’t really know.”

“You don’t remember?”

He shakes his head. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Tomori says.

“It’s--”

As the three continue their conversation, my eyes fall back on Rai. I had so many questions I wanted to ask them, so many things I wanted to do with them. Remember how you wanted to introduce Yuka and I to your super weird mom? Why…?! Why did this happen--why did you let this happen?! I would’ve protected you! Why did you do this--?!

“Look at Kitoaji’s nails,” Nakata says.

I look from Rai’s face to their hand. I touch their wrist, and…

…is it broken?

“Rai’s wrist is broken.”

“So they put up a fight,” Nakata says, smiling to herself. “Good.”

The smile on her face sickens me.

“Is that what that means?” Tomori asks, sighing. “Maybe Kitoaji’s hand got caught in a door frame.”

I look from Rai’s body to the blood trail that leads away from Rai, to one of the classrooms. I stand up and turn away from the three. I can’t look at Rai’s body anymore. I just can’t. Being here just makes me want to die.

“Where are you going?” Nakata asks. Her voice is so...accusatory.

“I’m going to investigate that classroom.”

“Not alone, you’re not.”

“I’ll go,” Tomori says, and she quickly drapes her arm around my shoulder. “Let’s go Rabbit.”

“Be careful,” Satoshi calls behind us.

Tomori doesn’t answer, instead she drags me along to the bloodtrail which ends up at Classroom 4-A. She basically shoves me inside, and closes the door behind us.

When I turned to look at her, her face was red with anger. She lunges forward and grabs the collar of my shirt.

“What the hell, Rabbit?!”

“What?”

She squints. “What do you mean ‘what’?! Kitoaji is dead! Why are you so calm?”

…

“Answer me. What the hell happened last night?!”

“I can’t, Tomori. I can’t do it anymore.”

“Everyone thinks it’s you, Rabbit. Why are you acting like this husk…?! It’s only gonna confirm their suspicions.”

“Tomori, please…”

“Rabbit, why?!”

My vision is starting to get a little blurry. Did one of my contacts--no, no, it’s wet. I’m crying. Again. Why--?!

“Rabbit…”

“I just can’t do this anymore, Tomori. I loved Rai. I loved Rai so much.”

Her grip loosens on my shirt. “I know, kid. I know.”

“I was so scared of losing anyone. Then I lost Sasada, Nakata, Yuka...Rai was the only one keeping me going. And now--! Now I’ve lost everything...it isn’t worth it anymore.”

I close my eyes. I don’t care what Tomori thinks anymore. She already knows I’m weak.

“Shut up, Rabbit.”

Oh, she sounds angry.

“You’re using Kitoaji’s death as an excuse to mask your weakness, aren’t you?”

I don’t answer her. But she probably already knows the answer.

“You were always so desperate and scared to lose someone, that you’d go to stupid lengths to prevent it. Yet, you failed.”

…

“You’re just like me,” she says.

Huh…?

I finally open my eyes, and...she wasn’t angry. No, she was far from it. She was...crying, just like me. “Tomori…?”

“I killed Shimazaki. I basically killed Shiho, too. And after that, I decided that I didn’t want to hurt anyone anymore. Sasada and Saishi sacrificed their lives to save mine, and I could never make things up to Yuka. Even now, everyone still looks at me like I’m some fucking murderer--!”

She pauses, and wipes her face with her shirt. “That’s weird--I don’t cry. What is this?”

She chuckles to herself. “I just wanted to make things up to you guys, and I couldn’t even do that. Why are they dead but I’m still here?”

I shake my head. “I...I feel the same. Why am *I* allowed to live when the others were so much more worthy.”

“It’s not a worth thing, I think. It’s just...luck.”

I open my mouth to talk, but Tomori suddenly wraps her arms around me and wraps me in a hug. “Okay! That’s enough sad talk for now! We have a traitor to catch.”

...

She lets me go and puts her hands on her hips. “I know it’s hard, but...can you tell me what happened last night?”

I know. I know this has to come out.

“Rai...did something to me last night.”

“Huh?”

“I think Rai drugged me last night--I don’t know what happened. Rai told me that they told you the password to get in, and then, everything...went dark. I don’t know what happened.”

She nods along. “That...makes sense, actually.”

“It does?”

''I was walking back to my room last night and heard someone walking down the stairs. I decided to wait and see who it was, and I saw Kitoaji shoving something into their pockets.''

''“Yo, Kitoaji. Whatcha got there?”''

''“Meds for my migraines,” they said, and showed me this medicine bottle. I didn’t know shit about medicine though, so for all I know it could’ve been something else. “I was about to get some water for Ken and I, I’m scared he’ll get nervous if I take too long, though.”''

''“He’s a worrywart,” I said. “Probably a good idea.”''

''“Yes!” Rai exclaimed. Rai then leaned in close, and whispered in my ear. “Five knocks if you want in later. It’s the password!”''

As Tomori finished her story, I just...frowned. “Do you think the bottle is still on Rai?”

“Probably,” Tomori says. “We’ll have to ask Nakata about that later.”

But...why? Why did Rai do that?

“Why do you believe me, Tomori?”

She shoves her hands in her pockets. “Because I want to, Rabbit. There’s nothing more to it than that.”

…

“You’re lying. I can hear it in your voice.”

The way her voice breaks halfway through the sentence was a pretty obvious indicator.

“I ain’t lyin’,” she says. “Think what you want, I don’t care. I’m not gonna let you throw your life away -- not when the rest of our lives are on the line. If there’s one thing I can still do is make sure you and Satoshi get out of here, got it? So don’t do something stupid.”

“I’ll try,” I say, and once again Tomori pats me on the back. She turns me to the direction of the puddle of blood that sits at the front of the classroom. I grimace -- I can’t help it. I hate hate hate blood.

“This is where Kitoaji probably fought the traitor, no?” she asks.

“I guess,” I mumble. “I mean--yeah.”

My eyes scatter up and down the aisles, looking for anything that could point us to anything. There has to be anything--anything that can help us out.

Tomori sighs. “Doesn’t look like there’s anything--”

“Ah-!” I interrupt.

“What is it?”

In the back of the classroom, on a locker, is an index card. I brush past Tomori, and I hear her footsteps behind me as I pick the card up.

''“meeet me in classroom 4 at 3:30. i know it’s you.”''

…

That lines up with the MonoMech File.

“Who sent this?” Tomori asks. “Do you recognize the handwriting?”

I shake my head, and Tomori frowns. “Well, it ain’t Shiomi’s, I know that much.”

Ah, Shiomi--!

“You’re a genius, Tomori.”

Tomori stares at me absently for a moment, before tilting her head. “You’ve got the wrong girl.”

I try to force out a laugh, but it doesn’t come. “I need to go find Shiomi.”

She just nods. “Okay.”

I swiftly leave Classroom 4-A and I hear Nakata yell out my name. The thought of staying behind and talking to her goes as quickly as it comes into mind, and I run down the hallway to wear I last saw Shiomi and Azama.

“Shiomi!” I call out.

No answer.

We don’t know when MonoMech will call time to start the trial like he does. I need to find him.

I start rushing down the stairs to the third floor, but, as soon as I reach the bottom, he appears before me.

His eyes are wide when he first sees me, and he instinctively loosens his scarf.

“Ah, Ken. Were you the one yelling for me?”

“Y-Yeah.”

“What’s wrong?”

I take a moment to catch my breath. “How’s Azama doing?”

He shrugs his shoulders. “She’s upset. Won’t talk to me, but, I won’t blame her.”

I...understand it. ”She’ll come around. Can you do me a favor?”

He stares at me for a moment, unsure if whether or not he should. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know what’s going on here. “Do you really think I’m the traitor, Shiomi?”

He shakes his head. “I don’t know what to believe anymore.”

“You really think I’d kill Rai?”

He shakes his head again. “I don’t know.”

...this isn’t gonna get anywhere.

“Can you just please do me a favor, Shiomi?”

He bites his lip. “Sure.”

“Can you bring your notebook to the trial. I need to see something.”

“My notebook…? Why?”

“Just...please.”

He sighs to himself, and turns his back to me. “Fine. I’ll get going.”

“Thank you.”

He begins to walk away, but before he gets far, he turns his head toward me. “If it is you, I’ll never forgive you.”

I just nod. “Okay.”

As Shiomi disappears, a cold, dark voice calls out to me.

“You’re in no position to be making demands right now, you know.”

“I know, Nakata.”

Nakata’s hand tightens around my shoulder, it was like she was telling me ‘I could kill you right now’.

“What were you having him do?”

“I needed him to get his notebook,” I say, reaching into my pocket for the index card. Once I have it, I hand it to her. “Tomori and I found this.”

She takes a moment to read over it, and nods. “Comparing his handwriting?”

“I’m sure Azama has written in there, too. This could make or break it.”

“I see.”

“Where were you last night?”

“My room.”

“That’s a lie,” she seethes, and I feel her grip tighten. “I didn’t see you.”

“See me?”

“I picked at your lock to talk to you last night, and no one was in your room. I could’ve swore I’d seen Tomori enter your room earlier that night, too, but--!”

Tomori was in my room…?

“Explain it. Where were you?”

“I don’t know,” I say. “I woke up last night under my bed.”

“Under your bed?”

“Yeah--I think Rai drugged me last night, Nakata. I don’t remember much about anything.”

“That’s interesting,” she says and she opts to let go of my shoulder. She steps in front of me and pierces my eyes with her cold, dead, eyes. “Are you the traitor, Ken?”

…

“What does it matter what I tell you? You’re not going to believe me. You’re just like everyone else.”

“Ken, I--”

I put my head down and push past her. The trial should be starting soon, but...I just need a moment to myself.

I walk down the hallway of the third floor until I get to one of the classrooms and I slip into it. I steadily close the door behind me and I instantly find myself on my knees.

Why…?!

Why’s this happening? Why is Rai--?!

I slam my fists into the ground. “Rai--don’t leave me here.”

Why, Rai? Why could you do something so selfish and leave me all alone--?! You don’t understand--! I don’t want you here; I need you. I need you so much.

I loved you so much.

DING DONG BING BONG

Ah, is it time…?

“Kiddies, I’m bored. Please gather in the gymnasium so we can start the class trial and end this game!”

I wipe away the wet from my face, and take a deep breath.

If it’s true that it ends if we uncover the traitor, than I have to put away all emotions. I have to lock them in a box and go into this trial with a clear head. Not just for my sake, but for Rai’s. Whoever killed Rai was the person behind this whole thing--!

But who could it be?

If I had to look at it objectively, Satoshi would be the prime suspect. His arrows were used to kill Rai, after all. However…

''“I’m here with you. If you uncover the traitor here, this game ends. It’ll finally end.”''

...could it really be him?

What about Shiomi? I don’t know if he’s smart enough to have been tricking us this entire time, truthfully...but that could be exactly what he was getting at. His notebook should prove his innocence, at least.

And then there’s Tomori. She’s strong, quick, fierce. She’s attempted to murder before, too. She’s the only person left who trusts me--it’d just be cruel if it turned out to be the traitor. But...she’s hiding something from me. I noticed it before, but Nakata confirmed it. What’s she hiding…?!

Azama’s next. She’s smart, but is always one of the first to spread distrust. It didn’t seem intentional--it just seemed like she was emotional, like Satoshi, but she’s proven that she can be objective too. It’s almost like she goes back and forth between emotional and objective--it’s weird.

And last but not least is Nakata. There’s...a lot I want to know, still. Despite her hating me--despite her insisting I’m the traitor, there’s a lot I need to still talk to her about. She’s a trained mercenary, though, let’s not forget the obvious. She’s rash at times, and surprisingly is prone to panic, like when she gave me the book and then attacked me. But, looking back on it, what if she was trying to tell me something? What if she was trying to ask for my help--and what if the motive this time around caused her to panic again, and Rai was in her way.

Before pointing the fingers at someone else, I need to at least prove my innocence. I was worried that I could’ve been an unwilling traitor--but now--! Now it’s impossible. I know I didn’t kill Rai; and, Rai knows it too.

I mindlessly got to the gymnasium, and I hold the door open for Satoshi, who was right on my tail. Tomori, Azama, Shiomi, and Nakata stand on the stage already, watching the two of us with hesitant eyes.

“Thanks,” he sheepishly says.

I just nod.

“Can we hurry this up?” Azama asks, at her stand. “Get up here, you two.”

“She’s getting on my nerves,” Satoshi whispers to me.

He offers me a gentle smile, and we take our places at our stands.

MonoMech sits at his throne, this time donning a red crown and a robe, overlooking the rest of us. It’s disgusting.

Satoshi stands to my right, with Mio’s portrait next to him. Next to Mio’s portrait is Yosano’s, and Tomori stands between hers and Obinata’s. Sasada’s portrait is next to Obinata’s, followed by Azama and Shiomi -- who has his notebook resting on his stand -- thank you. Tani’s portrait is next to Shiomi, and Nakata stands in the middle of Tani & Nakamoto’s portraits. Yuka, Saishi, Shiho, and now Rai’s portraits are next, and I feel my gaze fall on the red ‘X’ that covers Rai’s beautiful face.

Right...this is a reminder  The Ultimate Pianist of what we lost. Of who we killed so we could reach this point.

There’s always this anxiety that takes over me before a class trial--but this time it’s different. I’m not anxious, but rather...I feel broken. I feel like I’ve finally been broken. I can’t let anxiety take over me today, I need to--I need to find out who the traitor is.

The traitor killed Rai. My...my special person. I wouldn’t be alive if it weren’t for Rai. I truly feel like I wouldn’t have made it this far without their strength. And someone--someone took my strength away. I need to find this traitor.

And this person…

... The Ultimate Host, The Ultimate Beatboxer , The Ultimate Fashion Designer , The Ultimate DJ , The Ultimate Songwriter, The Ultimate Screenplay Writer , The Ultimate Model, The Ultimate Mercenary, The Ultimate Survival Games Player, The Ultimate Archer, The Ultimate Pitcher , The Ultimate Violinist, The Ultimate Arsonist , The Ultimate Gardener , The Ultimate Motivational Speaker …

...is one of us.

And the rest of us...it’s our job to expose the traitor and sentence them to their death. And if we fail to do that, we’ll be executed in their place.

But this time is different--! If we expose the traitor, we’ll be able to leave this place. But...part of me feels like it’s pointless now. Without Rai...what point do I have in living. Rai was the only thing keeping me going, and without it, there’s no reason for me to continue.

My eyes meet Tomori’s. She gives me a steady thumbs-up.

But if I could at least get them out of here, then I’ll do what I’ve got to do.

Nonetheless, our fifth -- and perhaps final class trial -- dawns on us. A battle of victory or defeat.”

“Alright, kiddos! Let’s do this!”

And it begins right now--!